opening up

If we all said everything on our minds the world would be a pretty noisy place. Our thoughts are textured with emotions, judgments, beliefs and ideas. As social creatures we need to communicate with others. The questions is- which pieces do we choose to share and with whom?

Each day we encounter and speak with many different people. But our most intimate thoughts are saved for particular people- safe people. And even then, we still have to evaluate how our precious ideas and viewpoints will be heard, listened to and reflected upon. It can be difficult to open up to others and we all hold the fear of being hurt and rejected.

Do you have safe people to share with? If not, where can you find and nurture those relationships? What pieces of your self are you willing to open up about? What are the qualities you look for in a person with whom you are willing to share? Do you foster those traits within yourself?

As you ponder these questions, consider one more- is there someone I can share my answers with?

easy people

I spent the afternoon with a good friend and as we walked, we spoke about the concept of "easy people." The Nields, a great folk duo, sum it up perfectly when they sing:

And I choose you to take up all of my time
I choose you because you're funny and kind
I want easy people from now on

I definitely crave easy people in my life, but who doesn't? The thing is though, surrounding ourselves with "easy people" doesn't necessarily mean surrounding ourselves with people who we don't have complex relationships with. In fact, I would dare to say that the easiest of people come from relationships that both people have invested time and energy to build a solid foundation. From there, both people can "sink into easy" as my friend put it. There is an ease with which they can be themselves because they feel both valued and understood.

I love the concept of easy people- and of choosing them. Have you chosen easy people in your life? How do we go about getting to the point of "easiness"? As you think about your relationships, which ones bring a smile to your face? Which ones do you want to be easier?

I hope we can all find easy people and without even knowing it- be the easy person for others.