Monday, July 10, 2006

moonbath

I have been craving a moonbath. The summers in San Francisco just aren't condusive to bathing in the moonlight. Alas, I will have to settle for my clean sheets and warm covers. Everyone says that today is the first day of the rest of your life. I think that is true for most days, but for me, the rest of my life starts tomorrow night. I don't know how it will turn out, but that is the exciting part- the possibilities that lie ahead...

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Darkness and Light

Can the darkness and light exist together? When I close my eyes at night, I wonder if the two blend or if the darkness completely overwhelms the light. Actually, I think that we can't experience one without the other. Something is not completely good or entirely bad. We can't have the beauty without the chaos and vice versa. Someone once said that our eyes are made up of darkness and light, yet we can only see out of the darkness. There is much truth in that. As I struggle right now with my life's challenges, I see both the black and the white. Instead of trying to blur them and live in the gray, as we tend to, I am aiming to live in both- the fear and the joy, the known and the unknown.

What does it feel like to sit in this fear? Which is easier to sit with, joy, fear, sadness? Why do such strong emotions exist, if our beings can't handle experiencing them? So many thoughts... I shall return to you, my new blog, soon enough. But, now I must return to my ever shifting life and my struggle to keep from muting the black and the white.